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Definition of Proship / Proshipping

Proshipping / being proship (also called being an anti-anti), at its core, just means you don't believe what people like in fiction dictates their morals in real lifeThis means you believe someone can like violent video games without condoning murder, and someone can like an age gap pairing without condoning that gap in reality. It acknowledges that survivors cope in a variety of ways and that sometimes dark topics need to be explored in fiction.This is a normal view to have and the typical view of adults engaging in fandom. Many popular shows such as Game of Thrones feature incestual topics and relationships, these are allowed to be popular and enjoying these media’s does not mean you condone incest in real life. This is, genuinely, the next step in the “video games cause violent children” argument and it’s been disproven time and time again.Proshipping does NOT mean “problematic shipping”. This is a version of the word coined by antis. Not all proshippers ship problematic ships!Proshipping is a VERB being used to describe the NOUN proshipper— it means the act of Being Proship. It is often used for simplicity and because English is a complex language that can be stretched in different contexts.Many use it as a simple definition to indicate they believe you can ship whatever you want!You may also see the word “Comship” around. This is a word that means “complicated ships” and indicates similar beliefs to Proshipping; this is meant to try and pull away from the stigma associated with being proship by asserting first and foremost that you acknowledge that the ship is problematic and that you don’t condone it in real life. Sometimes people also use this to indicate that they like complicated pairings such as an abuser and their victim or enjoy problematic media, such as killing stalking, but do not ship minors and adults or incest.

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Glossary

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Ties between Proshipping and trauma

many proshippers are trauma victims, and use Proshipping as a coping mechanism.
How? Well, for me personally— it gives me a chance to take control of a traumatic situation. It gives me the ability to create situations mimicking my trauma while I am in full control and can stop it whenever I like.These types of coping mechanisms are not maladaptive, and are often encouraged by therapists. They give victims a way to essentially imagine, roleplay, or make a situation similar to their trauma which can help lessen triggers in day to day life. In example; I am very triggered by the words Rape and Molestation. I do not like even typing them typically, but if I come across them in real life I don't have full panic attacks like I used to anymore because I engage in fictional content that uses those words. It is like a safe exposure therapy for me.It also helps people cope with OCD intrusive thoughts and can be healthier than following through with compulsions. In example; someone with POCD may have bad intrusive thoughts that they're a pedophile. Rather than engaging in repetitive assurance seeking compulsions; they can allow themselves to engage in things like lolicon, which is legal in the United States, and get their fantasy out without forcing other participants to engage in their rumination and compulsion as well as help fulfill the 'radical acceptance' way of thinking that many OCD related therapy requires. Such as; someone with POCD accepting that even if they are a pedophile, they make an active effort to never harm anybody and instead engage in safe fictional fantasies- which makes them better than any child predator.Every survivor is different and may engage with such content for a variety of reasons. The important part is to understand that engaging in this type of content does not make a survivor of assault the same or “as bad” as their abuser.

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Exploring vs Condoning

Exploring something fictional in media does NOT mean you condone it in real life.This is a well known and studied fact. Many proshippers use the phrase “fiction doesn’t affect reality” or “fiction =/= reality”. This is true; though many antis like to refute it with the argument of racist media being bad. To this, I propose a slight rephrasing.Fiction doesn’t change people’s morals; it reinforces what people already know.When most proshippers say the former, they mean the ladder. Many antis also like to use the movie Jaws as an example, and I believe it is a good example. Many people saw sharks as a scary dangerous creature, and it reinforced that idea. Similarly; racist media often reinforces racist ideals held in common society.But a popular show like Game Of Thrones featuring incest, or a Manwha like Killing Stalking featuring abuse and murder, or a video game like Grand Theft Auto featuring robberies, murder and more— will not make people think these things are okay. They are considered bad in society and unless some major changes happen to change that, people will not be easily swayed by a movie or fanfic.

“But, won’t people use this content to groom kids?”

I mean, possibly! I can’t say that won’t happen, especially since I have been groomed with such media before. But that’s not the fault of the media!This type of grooming can happen with anything; Star Wars, candy bars, pets such as kittens and puppies— anything a child likes that can make them trust the adult more can be used as a grooming tactic. Let’s not give groomers and child predators an easy out by claiming it was the media that made them hurt the kid, or worse, claim the media is the one who hurt the kid.I was groomed on Pesterchum; a chat application based around homestuck. This was not the fault of homestuck, or shippers, or Pesterchum— it is purely the fault of the adult man who groomed me.This line of thinking is akin to a predator using a chocolate bar to lure a child in, and blaming the chocolate bar for the assault. Any good person is only posting such content in places intended for adults, and tagged so minors and those sensitive to the topics can avoid it. Please curate your online space accordingly, and do not blame creators for your disgust.

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Antis and how they harm survivors.

The entire mindset of antis is inherently harmful to survivors in a variety of ways, but the community is also known for repetitively attacking, dog piling, and harming proshippers just trying to live their lives and share content.Here’s a non exhaustive gallery of some of the things just me and my friends have experienced from antis.

One of the biggest issues with antis is the fact they often suicide bait, threaten survivors, and insist victims are just as bad as their abusers.Furthermore; many of them have a tendency to water down words. Many of them will speak of lolicon being CSEM or “CP”. These people seem to have a fundamental misunderstanding of why CSEM (Child Sexual Exploitation Material) is bad. They misunderstand that it’s not bad because it’s “gross” or illegal, it’s bad because a child was abused to make it. They fundamentally do not understand that fictional content cannot be CSEM, because no real child was abused or involved in its creation. They do not understand that fictional content is okay because nobody involved in it is real.Antis often also water down words such as Pedophilia, incest, and grooming, often making bold claims against media and people that they believe fit these definitions— for example, many antis will argue two people cannot be shipped because they’re family when they’re in reality, just friends. (Such as Shiro and Keith in Voltron) or they believe the couple is too “pedophilic” despite both characters being adults (such as Sangwoo and Yoonbum from Killing Stalking). They often like to claim that people are abusers, groomers, or pedophiles for enjoying problematic content.Antis have been known to doxx people, share private information about proshippers traumas, and even have been caught spreading real CSEM due to the way their community has watered the definition down. That incident lead to arrests.
I have personally been told that I likely “enjoyed” or “deserved” my CSA trauma, all because I am a proshipper. These people believe that survivors who cope in ways they believe are bad do not deserve any respect.Antis have also been known to allow predators to flourish in their spaces, as they can use the claim they’re the only “safe adult” who understands these “bad ships” like them. It’s been proven time and time again that many antis end up engaging with abusive behaviours. Here’s one example, please view at your own risk as they may contain triggering content!

And lastly; Antis have been consistently antagonistic towards proshippers. They are accusatory, aggressive, and go out of their way to start arguments. Here is a final gallery of antis being… well, antis. Please view at your own risk.

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Resources and Evidence

Here is a non exhaustive list of resources regarding this topic. All of these are about the general topic and not specific to Proshipping, because this type of puritanical thinking is not exclusive to proship or fandom spaces.
This list is a work in progress!

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More Reading

Here are some other good resources regarding Proshipping.

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